Strengthening family relationships!


To all my beautiful ladies, I want to share with you the importance of healthy relationships with your siblings and parents. I also want to share my own experiences in hope that it will inspire you to better your relationship with your loved ones.


When God created us, He designed us to be in a family; therefore, family relationships are very important to God. Even the church, the universal body of believers, is called the family of God. When we receive God’s spirit, we are adopted into His family. God loves us so much that He gave us more then we deserve. He gave us the ability to love, to share, to fail and to rise up again.

family1.jpgI know that it can be hard to live with the same group of people until you’re married and begin your own journey with your new family. Nevertheless, this is the opportunity for us to learn all that we can from our parent(s) and sibling(s) and grow with knowledge and wisdom, so we can pass on what we learn to our future children. Exodus 20:12 says “Honour your father and mother, so you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”


God gave us parents so we can obey them and in doing so we gain wisdom. Proverbs 13:1 says, “A wise son heeds his father’s instruction, but a mocker does not respond to rebukes.”Parents can sometime be annoying and are always on your case about everything. Sometimes it may feel like you just need a break from them. As hard as it can be at times, be grateful for your parents because they raised you and nurtured you throughout your life even when it was difficult for them to do so. They made sacrifices and they often speak to us from their life experiences. It’s important to understand that parents are only hard on us because they want the best for us and want us to succeed in everything we do. Every parent is different; they all have sensitivities based on various life experiences so it may have been difficult growing up with your parents’ rules and seeing others being able to do things you couldn’t. However, it’s important to know that your parents love you and wanted what’s best for you. Always respect and honour them because in doing so you are also respecting and honouring God. When I got married to my husband, I cried for 2 weeks straight because I missed my parents and siblings so much. It was really hard for me not see them everyday. Eventually, I balanced my time to ensure that I spent time with both my families and eventually I got used to not seeing them everyday.  Always keep in mind that one day we will all be on our own and start a new journey making our own little families and our parent(s) will not always be there, so make every moment count.


God has blessed me with a younger sister and an older brother. Although things haven’t always been perfect, I’m truly grateful and thankful for them. I always thought because I was older than my sister that I can be bossy and I wouldn’t have to listen to anything she says, but I was so wrong. Believe it or not,there were many moments that I can remember where she was much more mature than I was. When I wanted to go out with friends that my parents disapproved of,she stood in the way. When I wanted money from parents during tough times, she gave me a good earful. The reason my sister was so hard on me was because of her obedience to my parents. My brother was the same way. Although my sister and I had our ups and downs, we always respected my brother because he was much older than us. I have no authority over my siblings, our parents have authority over us and God has authority over all of us. If you have a sibling(s) and you see that their actions affect the relationship that you have with your parents, then give them to God. You should also always remember to forgive and move on. Jesus died on the cross for our sins so if you disagree or are angry with your sibling(s), don’t let it last for too long because you will never find favor in God’s eyes unless you reconcile with your sibling(s). The bible says in Matthew 5: 23-24, “Therefore if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar.  First go and reconcile to them; then come and offer your gift”. Reconciling and forgiving one another is required before you can offer anything to the Lord. By the grace of God, my siblings and I have a better relationship now than we used to prior to being saved. If one of us is wrong, we will correct each other no matter how uncomfortable it may be. When we are confronted by one another, we try to hear the truth because in the end we understand that we each only have the other’s best interest at heart.


Over the span of 5 years, my siblings and I have lost 6 of our closest family members. The loss was unbearable and sometimes we still struggle with those feelings but we help each other and our parents through these tough times. So take it from me when I say that life is short and we don’t know God’s timing. Cherish each second that you have with your family members before it’s too late.

God knew exactly which family to place you in, so that those members can help shape you into the person you are to become in order for you to step into your calling. The difficult family members, as well as the loving ones, play a huge role in the growth and development of your character. So, I encourage all of you who are reading this entry to make peace and hash out whatever has been bothering you with your parent(s) and/or sibling(s). We will never be able to find favor in the sight of God if we cannot make peace with the ones that raised us or the ones we were raised with. I wish I had more time with my loved ones so I can tell them I love them so dearly. Every lesson I have learned from them has helped build me into who I am today. It gives me comfort and joy knowing that I have this group of people that care about me. Although, sometimes there have been moments where we struggled to get along, we had to change our mindset to understand that hearing the truth is important and we are lucky to have people who love us and teach us the truth.Don’t take your parent(s) or sibling(s) for granted, they are a gift from God so cherish and enjoy them everyday of your life just like you cherish and enjoy God’s love for you.


-Sofia Aruliah



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